Hello Goatlife,

I am confused by your posts. They seem genuine, but I also wonder how much, if any, sarcasm, exaggeration, humor, etc. Is involved.

And you are also smallcapgrowth? And who is dalmatian?

Anyway, your original post sounds to me like you are wanting a change. It reeks of defeat and the rawness of emotion that comes alongside surrender. As such, you may be teachable! (But for the life of me I cant understand why some are still praising your lifestyle and experiences when it sounds like to me you are on Death's doorstep.

I have personal and professional experience with recovery from addictions. Let me know if you are wanting (not 'just' needing) help.

-Overkill