![Quote](images/misc/quote_icon.png)
Originally Posted by
ZenMaster_Flash
The 3rd (full-time) year is the 'make-it or break-it'
year where you are powerfully conflicted and tense
Re: what you are doing with your life. you are living
a "Death of a Salesman" existence and as a Willie
Lomanesque character you are facing inner demons.
Hopefully you are not alone. You may be haunted by
thoughts and dreams about your self-worth and how
YOU measure it. An "identity crisis" may be growing
behind your eyes and between your ears. Obsession
and a depressive outlook are ego defenses. We cannot
think deeply Re: ourselves, as long as our brains are
over-active and playing BJ at a high level which involves
our being immersed in eyes-closed thinking about our
numerical minutiae, opportunity, problem-solving,
computations, acting (for camo') and both short-term
and long-term memorial functions. After many years
of living on the fringes of society and financially sup-
porting yourself (and others) all you can think about
is how you produce nothing, you create nothing, you
exist within a framework that only an "outlaw" can
empathize with. More and more, over time, money
will mean less and less and satisfaction in life will gain
increasing value.
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