Aww you can borrow mine with no fears, I always leave that sock behind lol I don't save it.Originally Posted by Freightman
I am sure when you got home you said to your wife, honey as usual I behaved myself and was all business. I had a good trip. Oh yes on a side note, I was stuck on a toilet seat without any paper so I used about 37 different used woman's toilet wipes from a garbage can. The response you got was what the hell is wrong with you? Why did you not use your socks? I am glad you behaved yourself.
Last edited by BoSox; 08-25-2017 at 09:25 AM.
I should be so compulsive. My first experience in this now familiar circumstance, was actually at a casino. Fortunately, npmy phone was with me, and thus, I called security to assist me in my time if need. Within short order, a uniformed individual arrived, pulled sufficient inventory from an adjoining stall, handing said paper to me, and all as well.
I guess I am lucky, mine will still ride with me in my ole beat up 87' Toyota pick up, manual, that's 2 different colors without AC that I use for off roading. On a few occasions we have stopped to eat or go gas station and a guy will say to her "how in the hell does he get you to ride in that". One time she went inside while I pumped gas and an older guy on the other side of the pump looked over and with a straight face said "your dick must be huge". I was crying I was laughing so hard. Then she came out of the gas station and I had told her what he said and her response was "you wish it was" *sigh* LOL
With that being said don't think she doesn't like to eat at fancy restaurants and go to nice venues and get all dolled up and be pampered but she will also camp without a tent and get her hands dirty. Best of both worlds for me
Okay. Getting back to restroom attendants. Let's just say my lady friend has no problem expressing her rights to free speech. Picture Sandra Bullock in The Blind Side and you are close.
So we are approaching small town usa in large state usa and nothing in between. The radio had no reception. We are between middle of nowhere and bumfuck Egypt. But there was no need as she was singing the tune of "I told you to get a room that had a complimentary breakfast. You cheap bastard." Picture the Mockingbird song. I chime in periodically with "but they had free coffee in the room. Yes, those little cookie crackers were stale, but not too bad if you dipped them in the coffee." Needless to say, this was not improving my situation. Yes, opening the door and jumping out did cross my mind. But I probably would've lived and then she woulda really been pissed.
So there is a McDonald's sign far in the distance. Like a gift from above right? Not exactly.
So we arrive. Evidently, dining at McD at 11am is the event of the day for the local folks. They live to small talk. The first guy in line asks if they serve hamburgers. The order taker replies, "gee I dunno, let me ask my manager." Just as Sandra begins to open, I say, "calm down, we are in a foreign atmosphere and these nice people might not understand the term "free speech." So she whispers under "we are in McDonalds, of course they serve hamburgers...and why would she need to check with the manager? What an eeediot! Let's go somewhere else." "Honey, there is nowhere else. Try to remain calm. It will be our turn to order soon." There is a changeover from the breakfast menu to the lunch menu at 11am. I figure a little payback for the two hours of her singing I enjoyed would be fun. Right? Wrong!
The next is an elderly couple in line. The gent asks, "what's in the Hearty breakfast? Only Sandra hears, why the Hearty breakfast? This leads to about 5 minutes of the gents wife and cashier talking simultaneously to confuse the gent who cant hear in the first place. Sandra can take no more. "Sir, it's because that's the one that will stop your heart the fastest" Only she can get away with that. The gent looks at her, laughs and says "okay, let's go with that." The cashiers replies, "Sir, we now no longer serve breakfast." Sandra begins to go into a transformation that would make Linda Blair seem like Mary Poppins. The "funny" story was starting to turn uncomfortable.
Finally, it's our turn. Sandra orders pancakes and a yogurt. I wince because I know what's coming. "I'm sorry maam, we no longer serve breakfast." "We've been standing in line for 15 minutes and you've taken two orders. How do you people even live here?" The cashiers offers the expected response of a blank, and I do mean blank, stare. "Okay, okay just give me the two yogurts then." I'm sorry maaam, that's an item on the breakfast menu and we don't serve breakfast after 11am. Sandra points "there is a frig full of them right there." Hold on, let me check with my manager. This leads to another 3 minutes of the Linda Blair stare in my direction.
So Sandra gets her yogurts. I concur with Freighter say, "it wasn't so much what I ordered but where I'd ordered it." Needless to say, I now know where the term "the runs" derived. It runs though me so I runs to the restroom.
However, the attendent was in the only stall, smoking a doobie, and reading from the stack of Hustler magazines. So, trying to keep the panic out of my voice. I knock and say "could you please hurry." The reply grunt sounded along the lines of somewhere between leave me alone and fuck you.
Now, we blackjack players are well known for being innovative thinkers. Im faced with the biggest challenge to date. Somehow, knocking on the ladies restroom door and asking Sandra to hurry didnt seem prudent. Kicking in the door and hurling the guy off the throne would have been a viable option 5 minutes prior. However, lifting my leg to kick was no longer possible. So I had no alernative, but to leave the smoking doobie attendant a tip right smack dab in the middle of the urinal. Hmmm. I've wondered how he now replies to the words "please hurry."
So Sandra and I exit out of the restrooms at the sametime. Okaaaay, you ready to get in the road?
Sandra replies, "let's get a hot fuge sundae to go." I reply, "naw, we really need to get going." Sandra quips, "so now you are all of a sudden in a big hurry? Cheap Bastard!"
Last edited by moses; 08-25-2017 at 11:36 AM.
Necessity is the mother if invention. Further, you have encouraged the individual in question to strengthen his resolve in customer service. The increase in his resolve however, may well be a variable one depending on the quality and substance of said tip.
Wonder why Don never joins in these hijacked threads.
"Wonder why Don never joins in these hijacked threads."
Because they are an embarrassment for an alleged serious blackjack forum. At the very least, instead of ruining myriad threads, all this nonsense should be assembled in one place, like the voodoo forum, so people who want to read about blackjack don't have to wade through the garbage.
Don
Don S probably has a life. lol
But, I was washing my hands as the attendant staggered from the stall. I put on my best "hey, it wasn't me look on my face." You woulda been proud.
It was the only time in my life, I heard the words "o shit" be truly applicable. Justice was served.
I understand what you mean but lets be honest if no non sense was ever posted then it would get boring pretty quick. I have read a ton of these threads and they pretty much all fall under the same few categories, Should I use this count? Is this place sweaty? Some dumb math question that could have been answered with literally 5 mins of research. Also threads about "is this a good game" for a game that obviously is not. Almost 0 trip reports of any relevance and I understand why that is. Very few post of outside the boxing thinking as they get bashed for anything against status quo. I have never viewed this forum as a "professional forum" but more as a forum where a few professional, such as yourself post.
This is actually the only forum I am on, non AP related, that does not have a "general discussion" section. Maybe there should be one....
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