Dealing with the big loss.

[Aslan]

Will you two just STOP IT!

I think they're brothers, one of them put up for adoption at birth. [inside joke based on being raised with 5 brothers]

[Three]

I think they're brothers, one of them put up for adoption at birth. [inside joke based on being raised with 5 brothers]

I am from a large family. I got a laugh out of it. I just have rarely met people that take things as negatively as Ex. Every helpful statement turned on its head and made into a threat. Everything spun in a negative way. I can't imagine going through life like that. A big part of health and happiness is being positive. I would no doubt have died of one of the many issues I cheated death on if I had that attitude. When you forgive it is a gift to yourself not the other person. Those tat don't forgive never get that and hold onto grudges forever. It eats them up inside and feeds a vicious cycle that makes you grumpier and grumpier. You can see it in his posts. It is very counterproductive. I truly wish that he learns to make better choices so he can be happier and not have health issues tat stem from holding onto such stupid things like they are a treasure.

My Dad had some serious health issues that organized medicine could do nothing about. The specialists said he would only get worse. He went to an alternate medicine guy who actually was a doctor. The alternate doctor's approach was you make yourself sick by not forgiving people and holding grudges which causes a lot of stress and your body starts to attack itself in various ways. He discovered there was major stresses from decades earlier that he held onto all those years. He forgave himself in some cases and others in other cases and his condition started to reverse itself. The traditional doctors called it a miracle and told him to keep doing whatever he was doing because it was working. The thing the doctors would do eventually was an operation that had 10% survival rate and would not fix the problem just reset the clock to a point a bit in the past. Having the body heal itself rather tan cause problems for itself worked and it all had to do with forgiving others and yourself. You can be spiteful and hold a grudge and have serious issues when you get older or you can have a positive outlook and not make yourself have health issues.

For my Father it helped with many of his late life health issues. If he had forgiven himself and others right when things happened he would likely have never had the issues to begin with. One had the word idiopathic in what the issue was. That means they have no clue why it occurs. There was also no treatment. In retrospect it is pretty obvious the cause is holding onto the baggage you should leave behind and not noticing the nice spirit that is in most people and how they interact with you. I think we can all learn a lesson from this and have better health and happiness throughout our lives. I preached this long before my Dad went to the alternate doctor (He was a MD and felt he wasn't treating the true causes that made people have serious conditions so he started practicing medicine that treated more than just the body). I didn't understand the full benefit of what I was trying, usually unsuccessfully, to people that were suffering because they can't forgive and see things in such a negative light. It was pretty amazing to see just how powerful both forgiving and not forgiving can be. I knew your current happiness and your ability to have good relations depended on it but I had no clue just how damaging holding onto the worthless negative crap can be to the body.

For me the decision is easy. There is no profit emotionally in holding onto the crap. You should hold on tight to the good stuff and do what is necessary to leave the crap behind. I do a pretty good job of that compared to others but I could do a lot better. Just like in the casino as an AP, the AP in life is constantly trying to get a better edge. For those that get it that edge is in attitude and perception and what they feel is important to hold on to and what they feel is important deal with and leave behind. I keep trying to increase my edge as a complete being. That edge has nothing to do with money but rather the more important things that govern your mental and physical health. They are how you deal with others. I know I have been ashamed of my interactions before. I do my best to forgive myself and the others involved and try not to do it again. If only it was as easy as it sounds.

[ohbehave]

I know I have been ashamed of my interactions before. I do my best to forgive myself and the others involved and try not to do it again. If only it was as easy as it sounds.

Forgiveness and loving others is never easy but a faith in Jesus Christ makes it possible. I know Mr. Aslan knows the Truth, I hope many others here do also.