Blackjack and Health Impacts (including Sleep)

[Goatlife]

I feel compelled to respond in this thread. Seriously all this stuff just screams to me of unresolved childhood truama. I have spent the last 2 years going on a journey find out what is important to me in life and when you do the deep deep work with well trained doctors you start to notice more similarities in people like you then differences. I'm giving my opinion here but all the stuff mentioned in this thread are symptoms of a core underlying problem. I also see the tendicy we all function better when our narrassitic defenses come out that makes us strive for workaholism and perfection. Serious people need to get to know " some of there ap idols and read threw there bullshit. Even the real rich ones are morbidaly obese, have no friends , girlfriends or kids, abuse drugs etc. they all just puff up that if there making money they are fine.

honestly I wish I never got into this lifestyle but you have to go threw what u have to go threw. Honestly for most people the best advice is cut ap out and get a life that involves other humans , lots of love and a family life.

[Freightman]

I feel compelled to respond in this thread. Seriously all this stuff just screams to me of unresolved childhood truama. I have spent the last 2 years going on a journey find out what is important to me in life and when you do the deep deep work with well trained doctors you start to notice more similarities in people like you then differences. I'm giving my opinion here but all the stuff mentioned in this thread are symptoms of a core underlying problem. I also see the tendicy we all function better when our narrassitic defenses come out that makes us strive for workaholism and perfection. Serious people need to get to know " some of there ap idols and read threw there bullshit. Even the real rich ones are morbidaly obese, have no friends , girlfriends or kids, abuse drugs etc. they all just puff up that if there making money they are fine.

honestly I wish I never got into this lifestyle but you have to go threw what u have to go threw. Honestly for most people the best advice is cut ap out and get a life that involves other humans , lots of love and a family life.

if you're smart about it, you can have both.

[ZenMaster_Flash]

Tarzan,

Sorry, but acclimating yourself to poor habits and
an unhealthy lifestyle does NOT make it acceptable.
It just means that you are "used to it."

Would you believe that I know an A.P. that is heavily
addicted to tobacco, in this day and age no less?
An [otherwise] intelligent person, he actually tries
lamely to defend his appalling addiction to poisonous
smoke.

[mcallister3200]

A full time AP has to be deliberate and thoughtful about maintaining regular exercise, decent diet and a community outside the AP world to maintain a healthy lifestyle IMO. Can certainly be challenging and requires extra effort due to the frequen travel and inconsistent schedules.

[GreenHouse]

Three :

I would not converge with your writtings. Its difficult because my english is not good but you dont focuse on the important points about sleep i think. I just talk after the reading of Diane BOIVIN book, this woman seems very recognized in her area so i trust her. She said most important are to sleep enough ( usually between 7-9 hours for most people), and at normal hours (meaning not going to bed too late) because otherwise circadians rythms are not well adjusted and your sleep has no good quality. I am just finishing her book.

She talks about cycles sleep, each cycle containing 4 sleep periods, which repeat perioically during the night. The most "usuful" period are 2 , 3 and 4. 5 are the last one and paradoxal sleep, when you make dreams. 3 and 4 is "slow-wave sleep" when its difficult to wake up you, so its normal is you wake up at the middle of this period, you are tired but Boivin doesnt focus on this.
Her advices are to be very regular on sleep hours ( rise and set), respect circadians rythms, sleep enough, not look the clock during the night, and others.
Your advices dont seem important and pertinent for Boivin i think, no offense from me three.

GreenHouse, you may find some value and commiseration on this forum, but your persistent emotional problems appear serious enough to warrant professional guidance. Your concerns about "health impact, addiction and fulfillment" show that you have insight into what's going on in your life. Have you seen a psychiatrist or psychologist since your deep depression?

It was four years ago, its ok now. I didnt want to see a psychiatrist, i am sceptical about them and the efficacity of drugs like antidepressant, is almost none, and in fact dangerous. Works and publications from david healy and borch jacobsen seems very solid about this.

I was a little bit more open minded with psychologist. I read some books about Cognitive behavioral therapy, and as i consider than i have a good background about myself and general health, i didnt want to see one. But i consifer Cognitive behavorial therapy as good, i do myself one as self educated.

But thank you now its ok, i am not the most happy guy but i am far from this past time. Time, good food, physical activity ( i really have focused about), being serious in general about health ( i think also about screen addictions) have help. I am satisfied with my comportement and reactions after this hard time.

[GreenHouse]

I read very carefully all your answers guys.

FishBear :

Thank you for your feed back. I see the self estim and level of psychism depending of genetics, childhood and lifestyle. Dont forget the genetics.
So maybe focuse on what you could control, and dont the regret the thing you can not control. Genetics, chilhood are not your responsability.
But now you can make choices about food, lifestyle. It wont make probably you the happiest guy of the world (is it really the goal ?). I am a "nutrition nazi guy" so i dont want to bother too much the forum, but for me its important.
Do you know white sugar is really bad ? Do you eat lots of high GI food ? Have you got some boulimic/anorexic period ? Lack of vitamin D could be very bad, and supplementation is easy.
Be aware of the "toxicologist" approach. Of course its not sufficient, many people with the best diet and lifestyle style would still keep psychism sufferings, but dont forget this. And let time sometimes. When facing a hard time, you cannot wish a quick evolution of your psychism.

( I cannot resist to the desire to recommand you to read the book of unabomber, many people in US only know this guy for the killings part, but his book is just very good according to me, BTW its one guy from this forum who speaks about before).

[sbrugby]

@FishBear

I'd recommend:
-Exercise for at least 10 min everyday, even just walking around the block. Will help greatly with sleep, mood, and cognition.
-Fish Oil & Vitamin D
-Blue Light Therapy is also very helpful, especially if you don't get outdoors much. Breaks you out of Sleep Inertia(grogginess) fast and help normalize sleeping patterns.
-Eat at least one serving of vegetable(not corn or white potato) and meat every day. Enough Dietary Fat is also important for Testosterone production, which increases energy/mood.
-Focus on getting great sleep(black-out shades, better mattress, earplugs, no screens in bed, etc. whatever it takes). Never lie in bed unless you going to sleep for the night. Getting 7-9 hours of uninterrupted, high quality sleep is INCREDIBLY important. Maybe even have a sleep study done or get a fitbit or other device to track your sleep.
-Books 'Feeling Good' for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and "The procrastination equation" were very helpful for me as well.
-Stimulants can potentially be very helpful too, but they must not interfere with sleep.

Your depression/lethargy are likely brought on by some combination of shitty sleep, low testosterone, and/or chemical imbalance in your head. The bullet points above will address these issues.
You may also have pervasive negative distortions of reality which the CBT in 'Feeling good' can help with.

[Fire Walker]

Greenhouse,

I don’t think anyone here said this directly to you so far, so I will: Based on what you’ve said and the thing's you're asking, I think you should swiftly walk away from Blackjack and fervently, tirelessly search for an interest that brings you Joy and can lead to a fulfilling avocation.

I play professionally for my primary income and have a family. I also have an exit strategy and am realistic that I cannot do this forever. I think my full-time run will be 3-5 years max. Now is an important time to mention that there is some depression in both of my bloodlines. I feel very stable now and live what I feel is a very happy and fulfilling life due to the freedom that AP affords me. I am taking full advantage of that time doing other things I enjoy, like spending much more time with my family than when I worked a 9-to-5. But, this takes constant hard work to be cognizant of good health: sleep, diet, exercise and mental well-being.

On the flipside, there were times during brutal runs in year one where I am very thankful that I had very loving and caring family and friends by my side. Had I been single, those thoughts and feelings may have turned lethal. I will also lionize a great friend now – ZMF, a.k.a. “Flash”, as he coached me (and others) through some of these dark periods as I believe few could have done. As a 25+ year successful full-time professional AP and former psychologist, he truly understood what I was going through. He went through a similar state of consciousness, especially in the beginning of is career, so was able to effectively empathize and unequivocally remind me that one can either effectively and healthily cope with the nature of these “austere and lonely offices”, or should walk away entirely.

Let me be very clear about one thing, when you have a healthy, replenishable bankroll and play recreationally, Blackjack is a walk in the park. When you turn it into a profession and play on a set bankroll (after working for a living for quite some time prior to this endeavor), the game has a way of boiling the worst, existential thoughts imaginable to the surface. It can torment you…for what seems like ages. It can take you to a darker place than you’ve been, maybe even to a place you never should have gone.

There are a lot of great posts in this thread in response to your original post, and I especially like what mcallister3200 and sbruby touched on. That being said, I will stick to my guns and reiterate that I think you should quit and forget the game for good and never look back, based on what you divulged of your mental propensities. The tip of the iceberg here is you make some money and support yourself. But, for how long? Then what? Will making money and supporting yourself Beating The House be fulfilling? No. 100% No. The other part of the iceberg, the drastically larger, hidden part of the iceberg is this: You too could end up cold and dead, below the surface, way too soon…if you are not 100% mentally stable enough to play this game without shrugging off the swings and supplementing your Life with other things that make you happy. My full intention here was to come off as sounding severe because you will be Playing with Your Life if you continue on without a sound state of mind.

I wish you well.

Sincerely,

FW

[Ustonzen]

What he said

[21frogman]

Fire Walker said it very well.

[stopgambling]

If the swing bothers you , you are playing too high ROR. I play with 1/4 kelly and people here tells me it is too low( unless replenisible) . NO WAY. i got a 1/4 down swing ( and close to) of my bank a few times which can easily happen . i remembered reading it is 1/3 of the time we can lose half of the bank playing full kelly and that is if one is playing PERFECTLY! i doubt that . If i was playing full kelly that means i lost half of my bank a few times! To me this game is about "SCORE , SCORE AND HIGH C.E."

[GreenHouse]

Fire Walker said it very well.

I agree. Thank you Fire Walker, i read very carefully your message and i have reflected about since. BTW I know you are a very good AP.
I have to be honest, gambling is very addicting. More than that, it has becomen the big part of my life, so compensate the lack of gambling, find new hobbies and job is not easy.
I try since i dont play to find for occupations. I am scary than with a normal job you get lot of boredom, also the social aspect of being salaried is also important i think ( its a disadvantage).
Unabomber talks in his writting than Humans needs goals, efforts to realize at least some of them, and best is with some kind of autonomy.

So i would like clearly to stop fully, but the problem is RIGHT NOW i have to face boredom if i am not gambling. Also i am not a "corporate" guy at all. I would think to be a little farmer, live very modestly or maybe being an artisan, but the transition from AP is not easy. Anyway, whatever i would do if i stop AP, i am right now scary about being in a very boredom situation, AP is maybe very not good for many aspects but at least when i am in trip AP, i dont have to face boredom.
I remember before AP, i was not at all satisfied with my life. For sure i didnt make all the things i should do and i should have changed lots of things, but i have no garantueed to be more satisfied if i stop AP.
But generally speaking i agree with you totally, i should stop. Health impacts and social impacts are too strong with AP, even with partial activity. I also would say in fact card counting could become very boring, except maybe for some people who are very skilled and are happy of that, and playing with advanced techniques.

AP for this is good, but i agree than the loneliness and health bad impacts make its activity probably not a good choice for me.
I havent played blackjack since 3 months and i have to admit than i am still in a total incertitude, its unconfortable and there is a conflict between the part of myself who wants to go on APing, and the other one who wants to stop fully.

[ZenMaster_Flash]

+1 firewalker.

A Cautionary Commentary:

What I would add is that firewalker's projection
of time in this profession is spot on. The first
year (full-time) is crazy. You travel and play
to a manic degree. The second year is generally
good (emotionally) as your obsessive behavior
hides itself ~ but financially, you have learned
how to deal with the Casino sub-culture.
The 3rd (full-time) year is the 'make-it or break-it'
year where you are powerfully conflicted and tense
Re: what you are doing with your life. you are living
a "Death of a Salesman" existence and as a Willie
Lomanesque character you are facing inner demons.
Hopefully you are not alone. You may be haunted by
thoughts and dreams about your self-worth and how
YOU measure it. An "identity crisis" may be growing
behind your eyes and between your ears. Obsession
and a depressive outlook are ego defenses. We cannot
think deeply Re: ourselves, as long as our brains are
over-active and playing BJ at a high level which involves
our being immersed in eyes-closed thinking about our
numerical minutiae, opportunity, problem-solving,
computations, acting (for camo') and both short-term
and long-term memorial functions. After many years
of living on the fringes of society and financially sup-
porting yourself (and others) all you can think about
is how you produce nothing, you create nothing, you
exist within a framework that only an "outlaw" can
empathize with. More and more, over time, money
will mean less and less and satisfaction in life will gain
increasing value.