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Thread: Post your snappy retorts to when the PC asks if you are counting.

  1. #1
    Senior Member BigJer's Avatar
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    Post your snappy retorts to when the PC asks if you are counting.

    I was just reminded of this in another thread.

    "I majored in Math in college!! We are known for not being able to count anything!"
    My Ability in Blackjack is a Gift from God!!

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    Senior Member Jabberwocky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigJer View Post
    I was just reminded of this in another thread.

    "I majored in Math in college!! We are known for not being able to count anything!"

    "I'm counting on losing all my money with these lousy rules-just a matter of how long it takes to get the job done."

  3. #3


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    Don't say a word. Either pretend not to hear, or look at them as if you're very confused. If you say anything, say "no," while slowly shaking your head.
    The Cash Cow.

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    What good would that do? They use the same number of cards each time.

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    "What, the cards? Shit! Can't tell if I have 6 or 16 at this point boss. You do the math! Use that fancy smarty-phone of yours to help me out. Now, do I double or hit?"

  6. #6


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    Quote Originally Posted by BigJer View Post
    I was just reminded of this in another thread.

    "I majored in Math in college!! We are known for not being able to count anything!"
    "I used to let the dealer count for me. But after a few times they took my bet under 21, now I count myself. Slow than dealer but that is my money so I am very accurate."

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    Quote Originally Posted by BJGenius007 View Post
    "I used to let the dealer count for me. But after a few times they took my bet under 21, now I count myself. Slow than dealer but that is my money so I am very accurate."
    That’s good. I’ve said stuff like:

    ME: “Counting? - like Tracking Cards?!...like with 600+ cards in that shoe right there?! Shit, I’m willing to learn if someone here can teach me! Do you know how to do it?!

    DEALER: (…crickets…)

    I’ve not used the following line, but it is Hysterical and I might borrow it one day. So, I was talking to Tthree a while back and told him how this female dealer kept incessantly dropping lines like, “I know you’re a professional…I can tell” while I was playing heads-up with her for a few shoes. It was really loud in that particular store, so I pretended not to hear her and didn’t respond. (I played maybe 25 minutes with her).


    Tthree: “You should have said, ‘Well, as a matter of fact I am a professional, but I’m off duty at the moment. However, I can give you my number for when you get off later.'”

    ROTFLMFAO

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    Senior Member BigJer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BJGenius007 View Post
    But after a few times they took my bet under 21
    Wait a minute..... I don't get it. Duh.
    My Ability in Blackjack is a Gift from God!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by BigJer View Post
    Wait a minute..... I don't get it. Duh.
    Sometimes I had perfect hand of 21 or 20 but dealers declared I had 22 and grabbed my chips. Normally it happened when I travelled to a new place, won too much and you could see the dealer really want me to lose.

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    Senior Member BigJer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BJGenius007 View Post
    Sometimes I had perfect hand of 21 or 20 but dealers declared I had 22 and grabbed my chips. Normally it happened when I travelled to a new place, won too much and you could see the dealer really want me to lose.
    Lol.Thanks!!
    My Ability in Blackjack is a Gift from God!!

  11. #11


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    Quote Originally Posted by Tthree View Post
    I have rarely encountered dealers that wanted me to loss. The rare ones I find don't care if you have lost $100K already they still want you to lose.
    There are dealers who want players to lose by default, especially it is only fair when everybody else was losing but you. Just watch out those who take matters into their own hands. They miscount by purpose. The worst ones even skip the second card that can give me a Blackjack. How could you miss dealing a card? He or she was telling himself/herself not to give me a good hand in subconscious!
    Last edited by BJGenius007; 12-03-2016 at 06:11 PM.

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    Senior Member Jabberwocky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BJGenius007 View Post
    There are dealers who want players to lose by default, especially it is only fair when everybody else was losing but you. Just watch out those who take matters into their own hands. They miscount by purpose. The worse ones even skip the second card that can give me a Blackjack. How could you miss dealing a card? He or she was telling himself/herself not to give me a good hand in subconscious!

    Placing a bet for them works wonders. Remember that money talks but bullshit walks.

  13. #13


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    I say "Eh. I tried that once. It didn't work."

    Never feign ignorance.. everyone knows what card counting is.

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