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Thread: Humor - Rejected Blackjack Book Titles

  1. #1


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    Humor - Rejected Blackjack Book Titles

    As some of you know, my book, "1536 Free Waters and Other Blackjack Endeavors - Finding Profit and Humor in Card-Counting" is scheduled for publication soon. I still could use a last-minute endorsement from Arnold Snyder or any other famous Blackjack face...anyone?

    While coming up with a title for the book, I also had to determine the book classification. It was a tricky choice between “Games” and “Humor.” Since I could only pick one, I went with “Games”…adding “Humor” in the subtitle will hopefully be a catch-all for the other classification. Just so you know, I rejected these other titles in case the book was classified a different way:

    In the Fiction area:
    Fifty Additional Shades of Grey – My Life of S&M in Underground Casinos

    Science Fiction:
    The Real Hunger Games – 42 Straight Hours of Playing Blackjack While Eating Only a Half-Empty Tin of Altoids

    Sports:
    Playing Blackjack is More of a Sport Than 27 Events Played at the 2012 London Summer Olympics

    History:
    General Douglas MacArthur – Great Leader, But Really ****ty Blackjack Player

    Parenting and Family:
    Mommy, Why is Daddy Always at the Casino?

    Travel:
    Visit Mesquite, Nevada – But Watch Out for the Douche Bag Pit Manager at the Casablanca Casino Who Backed Me Off for Card-Counting Even Though I Was Losing $800 at the Time

    Mystery:
    The Angry Man Who Killed a Cocktail Waitress with a Nine of Diamonds

    Reference:
    “G-****-KRICE-YOU-FRIGGIN-BUTTNUTT-I-CAN’T-BELIEVE-YOU-TOOK-THAT-CARD” and Other New Entries in the Webster Blackjack Dictionary

    Law:
    Keeping Chips Found on the Casino Floor – It’s Not Stealing If You Don’t Get Caught

    Religion:
    I Found Jesus – He Was Eating a Muffin in the Alley Between the Palazzo Hotel and the Imperial Palace Casino in Las Vegas

    Literature:
    Absence of Sense and Sensibility – Average Blackjack Players

    Kids:
    Stranger Danger – Stay Clear of That Wiggy Guy Who Asks, “Wanna See the Chips in My Pocket?”

    Young Adult:
    Stranger Danger – Stay Clear of That Wiggy Guy Who Asks, “Wanna See the Chips in My Pocket?”

    Adult Women, Ages 18-25
    Welcoming Strangers – No Need to Stay Clear of That Wiggy Guy Who Asks, “Wanna See the Chips in My Pocket?”

    Trivia:
    The Game of Blackjack Was Invented in 2009 in Kodiak, Alaska, and Other Lesser-Known Gambling Trivia

    Politics:
    Like It or Not, Americans, Your President is Black, Jack!

    Diet & Health:
    Morbidly Obese People Spotted at the Casino – Counting Cards Instead of Counting Calories

    Art:
    Mona Lisa – The Original Model for the Queen of Clubs

    Self-Help:
    You Suck – Why You Shouldn’t Sit Next to Me at the Blackjack Table

    Pets:
    My Dog, Newman, Was Spaded Seven Years Ago – But He is Still a Better Blackjack Player Than Many of You

    Automotive:
    My Car Has a Cracked Windshield and Faulty Transmission – But It is Still a Better Blackjack Player Than Many of You

    Romance:
    1536 Free Waters and the Clean-Up Required After Trysts with 1536 Vegas Prostitutes

    Do you have any rejected Blackjack book titles of your own? If so, please share them in this forum.

    Glen

  2. #2


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    I don't know abut an endorsement but I'd be happy to review it. Did you ask Snyder?

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    Quote Originally Posted by RWM View Post
    I don't know abut an endorsement but I'd be happy to review it. Did you ask Snyder?
    I did ask Arnold. He said I was funny, but never got around to sending me a formal endorsement. If you'd like to give the book a review, please email me at [email protected]

    Thanks

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    "Funny" -Arnold Snyder.

    That'll do nicely.

  5. #5
    Senior Member happyjack21's Avatar
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    +1

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    Two more entries submitted by friends:

    Kid's book: Blackjack and the Beanstalk

    Murder Mystery: Blackjack the Ripper

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